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featured poets & artists


mike madean

mike madean is 35 years old and just recently started writing. he lives in ann arbor, mi and work on an assembly line in saline, mi.



It was in January of '95 in Toledo, Ohio
when Kathy and me stood in front of a chapel that had
bars on the window.
We were getting married.
We had officially lost our minds.
She more than me,
I was a drunk.
And at that moment standing in front of the
door waiting to get buzzed in, as if we were
at a pawn shop, my nerves were howling for a
drink of whiskey, beer, wine, or even mouthwash, anything
with alcohol in it.
But I was dry.
I had promised Kathy that I wouldn't drink anything until
after the wedding.
I looked down the street.
There was probably a party store or bar not too far away
I thought.
But that would have to wait.
We got buzzed into the chapel.
A large black woman who was marrying us
met us at the door.
She told Kathy were she could get ready.
I went into the men's bathroom
looked into the mirror.
What the fuck are you doing here?
Don't go through with it, I thought.
to a party store
to a bar
in front of a moving car
to an insane asylum
anywhere but to the alter.
But I was a coward.
I walked up to the alter,
80 proof sweat
running down my back and forehead
and repeated after the preacher.
Then I kissed the bride,
and smiled for the camera,
thinking not much longer and
I'll be drunk
and able to relax.

Then I'll plan my escape.

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