mike madean is 35 years old and just recently started writing.
he lives in ann arbor, mi and work on an assembly line in saline,
A DRUNK AND A LONELY WOMAN TAKES THE PLUNGE
It was in January of '95 in Toledo, Ohio
when Kathy and me stood in front of a chapel that had
bars on the window.
We were getting married.
We had officially lost our minds.
She more than me,
I was a drunk.
And at that moment standing in front of the
door waiting to get buzzed in, as if we were
at a pawn shop, my nerves were howling for a
drink of whiskey, beer, wine, or even mouthwash, anything
with alcohol in it.
But I was dry.
I had promised Kathy that I wouldn't drink anything until
after the wedding.
I looked down the street.
There was probably a party store or bar not too far away
But that would have to wait.
We got buzzed into the chapel.
A large black woman who was marrying us
met us at the door.
She told Kathy were she could get ready.
I went into the men's bathroom
looked into the mirror.
What the fuck are you doing here?
Don't go through with it, I thought.
to a party store
to a bar
in front of a moving car
to an insane asylum
anywhere but to the alter.
But I was a coward.
I walked up to the alter,
80 proof sweat
running down my back and forehead
and repeated after the preacher.
Then I kissed the bride,
and smiled for the camera,
thinking not much longer and
I'll be drunk
and able to relax.
Then I'll plan my escape.